Thursday, June 10, 2010

My Nail Polish has Chipped into the Shape of the State of Texas

For real. On the index finger of my left hand. It hasn't chipped any further, it's just sitting there, in the shape of Texas. I see this as some type of omen of sorts - that perhaps I should start a one woman human freak show. Other things I could charge to see: wiggling my ears, raising one eyebrow, touching my tongue to my nose, fitting my entire fist into my mouth, my double-jointed fingers, crossing one eye, bending my wrist so that my thumb can lie flat on my inner arm, and sitting and putting my ankle behind my head. To say I'm flexible is an understatement I suppose. If I charged a quarter per "talent", including the State of Texas - I could make $2.25 per customer. Not too shabby.

So, I'm learning a lot in my days of unemployment/employment as a nanny. It's surreal at times. To say I'm unemployed is a falsity. I have 8 regular "jobs" per week + pick up gigs. It's just that to now work as a babysitter/nanny from working as an assistant for a tv personality, well, it feels like unemployment, and my bank account would agree. For a while I collected an unemployment check from the government, until one of the jobs that I took was "legit" and I started working for a real company as opposed to babysitting like a high school student, and I started reporting income, and then I felt as though I shouldn't be collecting unemployment any longer, even though my mother says that I'm still entitled to it. I dunno. I struggle with this.

Anyway. I have this one family in particular that I sit for that I like a lot. The mom is very nice, a seemingly very sincere woman with two adorable children 3 and under when I started sitting for them. We'll call them Family A for the sake of anonymity. Around the holidays, she had a third bundle of joy. Family A introduced me to Family B during a large group babysitting job that I did for them. The mom of Family B seemed nice as well, though her children were not so nice. They were equally as cute as the children of Family A, but horribly behaved. Whatever, what are you going to do - these kids are 3 and under, so to a certain extent, it is what it is. The mom of Family B asked me for my contact information as she often needs a sitter. Great, I'll take all the jobs I can get.

So, Mom B contacts me, "Hey Lucy - here are a bunch of dates I need, blah blah blah blah blah, oh and here is what we pay: ridiculously low rate when the kiddos are awake, and even lower ridiculously low rate when they are sleeping. Let me know if these dates work for you." Um - what? Ha. That's a joke, right? So I read it again to ensure I was reading correctly, and yep, I was. I decided right then and there that I'd NEVER be sitting for Family B. I have always been "otherwise engaged" when Family B has asked, but have thanked them for asking. I have never in my entire life, even in Jr. High and High School been paid a different rate to watch somebody's children when they are sleeping. One doesn't pay for child care by whether or not the child is awake or asleep - one should be paying for child care based on the fact that somebody competent is there ensuring that your child/children are safe and well cared for and able to handle an emergency should, God forbid, one arise. My time is my time, regardless of whether or not your children are asleep or awake, and if you can't see it like that, well then, find somebody else. I didn't feel it was my place to set her straight on this, I just politely declined each and every time, and made it my own personal policy not to sit for her.

So, flash forward to a couple of months ago. Family A contacts me and asks me if I'd like to sit for them regularly one morning a week for 4 hours, as Mom A is going back to work part-time. Great I say, I'd love it. It's followed up with an email "Oh, and so Mom B says she'll also bring her kids over, and we'll pay you x amount." Ugh. So I'm roped into babysitting once a week for Mom B after all. I had a bad feeling about it once Mom B was involved, but I'd already committed to the time, so I couldn't exactly back out now - what would my excuse be? So I agree to the x rate, which was more than fair.

So we start the sitting, and it goes ok. Several weeks go by, and all parties are there, and x is paid and all is fine.

But then Mom B isn't there, and nobody talks to me ahead of time about my rate being different when Mom B isn't there during that time, and my time is used just like our verbal agreement suggested it would be, and I'm not paid x. Hmmm...weird. I'm paid x minus a significant amount. But the next week everyone is there again and x is paid.

Then the next week comes and I have another opportunity to sit someplace else, making the same x amount as I make at my Moms A/B gig. I often have this same opportunity on the same morning that I've agreed to sit for Moms A/B and I've had to decline because of this arrangement that I've made with the Moms. But on this particular week, the evening before I'm to sit, I get an email from Mom A, "Hi Lucy, sorry to have to do this to you, but my kids are sick, and I'm going to have to cancel tomorrow - I'm sure Mom B will still need you I've copied her on this email, I'll leave it to the two of you to figure out." ARGH! Now, I'm totally stuck sitting for Mom B's kid, which goes against my personal policy.

My other personal policy in babysitting is to not cancel on people. The boyfriend has Macy, and I know what it's like to be cancelled on, and it's not fun. I don't do it unless it's an emergency, so I know that I'm not going to cancel on Mom B, I also know that I've got to set a firm boundary so she understands that I'm not accepting her ridiculously low rate. She replies to Mom A's email right away, telling me - great, I can watch her son at her house because she has several clients scheduled (she's also works during that morning each week).

I decide to just boldly go for it. I reply to both of them and say, "Mom A - so sorry that your children are sick, I hope everybody feels better. We've never talked about a cancellation policy, perhaps now would be an appropriate time to do so, as I gave up another opportunity to keep my commitment here. Mom B, I'm happy to come to your house - my rate for one child is: y. Let me know if that works for you and I'll see you in the morning."

Mom A replies that yes, we should discuss a cancellation policy. Mom B replies that the rate will be fine as now it's too late to cancel her clients. I know Mom B felt that I had her by the balls, but I'm sorry lady, you can't underpay, it's not like I'm watching something unimportant here - it's your child.

As a side bar, that's one thing I really don't understand about people. I really don't. People will pay all kinds of money to have their hair done, or their cars detailed, their nails done, designer clothing, whatever - but come to childcare - CHILDCARE, their children, and some people are so cheap! I mean, shouldn't you be paying the most for childcare?

Don't get me wrong, I'm ALL about getting my nails done, and designer clothing, and getting my car detailed and all that stuff (um, when I had money, smile) - but if I had a child of my own, I would NOT skimp on childcare. I don't with Macy, and she's not even mine.

This baffles me. It really does. I'm am seriously a good babysitter. I am super anal retentive. I'm am super safety dog good. And I'm not just saying that. I am fun, engaging, I will teach your child manners, how to read, how to cook, I will clean your house during their nap or after they go to bed, in all honesty, I am a really good sitter, and so to try to pay me poorly, or any sitter poorly who is watching your precious children? I'm sorry, I just do NOT get it.

Anyway, the end of this very long and probably boring story to you by now is this: I lost the job. Sorta. Basically, Mom A, who like I said, is sincere, she said that over the summer she and Mom B would be traveling a lot and so some weeks it might just be Mom A and some weeks it might just be Mom B, and would I prefer it if I just sat for the whole crew and came back in September? So I said sure. I can't deal with being underpaid. Plus, they made a verbal arrangement for x per hour for 4 hours, and aren't paying me that. It just doesn't seem fair. She was super thoughtful about it, really. She said that she knows that I have a lot of other families that I sit for, and she is giving me an opportunity to do that over the summer.

The unfortunate thing is, that I really do like Mom A a lot. I'm sure Mom B is a nice enough person, she just pays poorly. I wish I could be honest and say to Mom A - I'd love to sit for you this summer, I just can't be underpaid by Mom B, but that won't work, they are like best friends, and it would be really REALLY inappropriate of me to tell her that her bestie is a cheapskate.

In all honesty, if I had me as a sitter, I'd just pay me the x per hour and keep me through the summer and not risk that I find another job and can't come back in September, because in all honesty, that's the risk they are taking.

Now that I think of it though, perhaps Mom A knows her bestie is a cheapskate...maybe Mom A could pay me x on her weeks, but knows that Mom B wouldn't, or couldn't. Maybe she's not a cheapskate at all, maybe she has some financial situation I know nothing of.

So, anyway, here's to hoping that I find another job.

I think it will all work out fine.

And if not, I'll go to the pool with Macy.

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